Keep up the fight, Julie Anne. Every day that you live, you are a winner and your problems aren’t. I’m sorry about you not being able to have your son living with you, but I’ll bet he grows into someone who will have a lot of compassion and love for others. Our kids learn from us about strength and love. Your laughing and smiling is what he is going to remember when he is an older adult, not your braces and crutches. What makes you their mother is what your children will take from you. You teach them about your diseases so they will learn and be nice to others who have challenges, but make sure your children know that the disease isn’t who you are. You sound like a wonderful,, strong mother and person. I’ve been fighting this fight for over 30 years and I know I’m not as strong as I used to be, but I’m older, too. Stay positive. It was hard on my teenage boys when my diseases started getting bad and we had no idea what was happening to me. They didn’t understand and believe me, neither did my husband and I and we were scared. As the test results came back each time over 5 years of tests, we were happy that I didn’t have any of those serious life-threatening diseases, but didn’t have any reasons as to what it was over 30 years ago or what it would do to me. Now, the way I function is that every day that has less pain or less fatigue is a day that is a really good day. I’ve had to give up so many things that I enjoyed that I enjoy the things I have found to do more enjoyable. Each of those days is great. I sure didn’t see great days years ago in the same way I do now, but they became good enough and I started to change my thinking about what is good and positive. What I would like a researcher to find first is something to take away that fire pain inside my skin while the outside of my skin is ice cold. It sure makes it hard to know if I should use hot or cold to treat pain. Besides it is just wierd-feeling and hard to describe. The aches of having the flu is the only thing we can find to try to describe it, but no one can understand it unless they have felt it. I can feel okay one minute and then it just comes on suddenly. That gives me an idea for a post….

Keep up the fight, Julie Anne. Every day that you live, you are a winner and your problems aren’t. I’m sorry about you not being able to have your son living with you, but I’ll bet he grows into someone who will have a lot of compassion and love for others. Our kids learn from us about strength and love. Your laughing and smiling is what he is going to remember when he is an older adult, not your braces and crutches. What makes you their mother is what your children will take from you. You teach them about your diseases so they will learn and be nice to others who have challenges, but make sure your children know that the disease isn’t who you are. You sound like a wonderful,, strong mother and person. I’ve been fighting this fight for over 30 years and I know I’m not as strong as I used to be, but I’m older, too. Stay positive. It was hard on my teenage boys when my diseases started getting bad and we had no idea what was happening to me. They didn’t understand and believe me, neither did my husband and I and we were scared. As the test results came back each time over 5 years of tests, we were happy that I didn’t have any of those serious life-threatening diseases, but didn’t have any reasons as to what it was over 30 years ago or what it would do to me. Now, the way I function is that every day that has less pain or less fatigue is a day that is a really good day. I’ve had to give up so many things that I enjoyed that I enjoy the things I have found to do more enjoyable. Each of those days is great. I sure didn’t see great days years ago in the same way I do now, but they became good enough and I started to change my thinking about what is good and positive. What I would like a researcher to find first is something to take away that fire pain inside my skin while the outside of my skin is ice cold. It sure makes it hard to know if I should use hot or cold to treat pain. Besides it is just wierd-feeling and hard to describe. The aches of having the flu is the only thing we can find to try to describe it, but no one can understand it unless they have felt it. I can feel okay one minute and then it just comes on suddenly. That gives me an idea for a post….

Jullie, all we can keep telling ourselves is that one day there will be either a cure or a way to successfully treat this. It happened with some types of MS and it will happen for those of us with Fibro., Arthritis and all of the other things that go along with them. Until then, we live our lives and just fight on every day. I hope that you get back to your version of “normal” soon. I have IBS, too. What a pain that disease can be at times, huh? I don’t know if it will help you or not, but my IBS has gotten a little better over the last couple of decades, but wow I have to be careful what I eat and when. Turns out that I can’t digest dairy foods at all and that I have the same problem with wheat and some other grains. I’ve had to give up a lot of foods–some for good and some for when my IBS is acting up. Most of the time that works, but not if I ignore the triggers. Stress also is a big trigger for my IBS. I have really had to learn to cool it and not let myself get stressed very much, but it does happen and I do pay for that in many ways. You’ll get back on your feet soon. 🙂

Jullie, all we can keep telling ourselves is that one day there will be either a cure or a way to successfully treat this. It happened with some types of MS and it will happen for those of us with Fibro., Arthritis and all of the other things that go along with them. Until then, we live our lives and just fight on every day. I hope that you get back to your version of “normal” soon. I have IBS, too. What a pain that disease can be at times, huh? I don’t know if it will help you or not, but my IBS has gotten a little better over the last couple of decades, but wow I have to be careful what I eat and when. Turns out that I can’t digest dairy foods at all and that I have the same problem with wheat and some other grains. I’ve had to give up a lot of foods–some for good and some for when my IBS is acting up. Most of the time that works, but not if I ignore the triggers. Stress also is a big trigger for my IBS. I have really had to learn to cool it and not let myself get stressed very much, but it does happen and I do pay for that in many ways. You’ll get back on your feet soon. 🙂

Rebecca, I have had muscle spasm problems for about 25 years now. I take a muscle relaxer to help with that, but our new doctor is making noise about taking me off the them now that I’m in my mid-60’s. I take pain meds. when I have to. I’m trying to figure out what they are planning to do about the muscle spasms if they take me off of the med. I won’t let myself get depressed because that is letting the Fibro. win. I pray to God that He lets me be the winner over these diseases and He and my angels are stronger than the pain and the bad stuff the thoughts keep forcing on you. I make it one day at a time. My fibro and CFIDS are classified as serious to severe, but each day that I can control them is a day that I WIN! I was 39 when I had to stop working and our boys were active, busy teenagers by then and asked me to stay home anyway. It worked out just right because I asked God to help me get through it and was stubborn enough to not give in. Everyone is different in what they can take and what they have to deal with. Remember the prayer about accepting what you cannot change, change the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference. That prayer is perfect for Fibromites like us. I pray for that wisdom and have stopped wishing I was able to do what I did when I was young. I’m really hoping that we get a cure in our lifetime. That would be wonderful for the millions of us who live with Fibro, but none of us are the same people who we were. We have the wisdom that hard days have brought to us, the understanding that we weren’t able to have before because we didn’t have the life experiences we have now, the patience we have now to get through each day and then to look behind us and see how strong we were to get through past days. Take each day and go for the victory of getting through that day without the Fibro taking you down. You and I have had decades of getting though each day and we are the winners–not our health problems! Smile every day when you realize that you can get though any tough day because you have done it many times. I always try to remember during those bad days that there is a reason that God has let me, and helped me, to get through each day and that though it really sucks, there are a lot of people who are having a tougher time than me that day. Every day I was negative or felt sorry for myself (and I still do sometimes) the pain is a lot worse. Keep an eye on that and see if that is true for you, too. For me, that is just giving in to the pain. Find stuff to laugh at online. Laughing and positive feelings seem to help me when I allow the negatives to come to the surface. Just try it when you have bad days. There are a lot more relationships that change and get stronger and more mature than there are those who break up. My two younger sisters also have Fibro and still have their husbands like I do. We just taught the BIL’s what support looked like and not to be selfish like they were being. The way I look at it is that those relationships that break up weren’t based on the right foundation anyway. The vows said, “For better or for worse” and you cannot control which of you is going to have a “worse” and life has to change. No one needs a selfish mate or fairweather friends when you have to deal with the Fibro, too. There are always people out there who are understanding, good people who want to be in a Fibromite’s life.

Rebecca, I have had muscle spasm problems for about 25 years now. I take a muscle relaxer to help with that, but our new doctor is making noise about taking me off the them now that I’m in my mid-60’s. I take pain meds. when I have to. I’m trying to figure out what they are planning to do about the muscle spasms if they take me off of the med. I won’t let myself get depressed because that is letting the Fibro. win. I pray to God that He lets me be the winner over these diseases and He and my angels are stronger than the pain and the bad stuff the thoughts keep forcing on you. I make it one day at a time. My fibro and CFIDS are classified as serious to severe, but each day that I can control them is a day that I WIN! I was 39 when I had to stop working and our boys were active, busy teenagers by then and asked me to stay home anyway. It worked out just right because I asked God to help me get through it and was stubborn enough to not give in. Everyone is different in what they can take and what they have to deal with. Remember the prayer about accepting what you cannot change, change the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference. That prayer is perfect for Fibromites like us. I pray for that wisdom and have stopped wishing I was able to do what I did when I was young. I’m really hoping that we get a cure in our lifetime. That would be wonderful for the millions of us who live with Fibro, but none of us are the same people who we were. We have the wisdom that hard days have brought to us, the understanding that we weren’t able to have before because we didn’t have the life experiences we have now, the patience we have now to get through each day and then to look behind us and see how strong we were to get through past days. Take each day and go for the victory of getting through that day without the Fibro taking you down. You and I have had decades of getting though each day and we are the winners–not our health problems! Smile every day when you realize that you can get though any tough day because you have done it many times. I always try to remember during those bad days that there is a reason that God has let me, and helped me, to get through each day and that though it really sucks, there are a lot of people who are having a tougher time than me that day. Every day I was negative or felt sorry for myself (and I still do sometimes) the pain is a lot worse. Keep an eye on that and see if that is true for you, too. For me, that is just giving in to the pain. Find stuff to laugh at online. Laughing and positive feelings seem to help me when I allow the negatives to come to the surface. Just try it when you have bad days. There are a lot more relationships that change and get stronger and more mature than there are those who break up. My two younger sisters also have Fibro and still have their husbands like I do. We just taught the BIL’s what support looked like and not to be selfish like they were being. The way I look at it is that those relationships that break up weren’t based on the right foundation anyway. The vows said, “For better or for worse” and you cannot control which of you is going to have a “worse” and life has to change. No one needs a selfish mate or fairweather friends when you have to deal with the Fibro, too. There are always people out there who are understanding, good people who want to be in a Fibromite’s life.

I have met many men who have Fibro over the years. If you can find a Fibro support group in your area, you will meet men, women and even some children who have Fibro and it’s related diseases. Also the more you learn about it, the easier it is to deal with it. I’m one of those people who has had Fibro for so long that my doctors had to learn from treating people like me–when Fibro wasn’t excepted by doctors or anyone for that matter and we were made to feel it was all in our heads. I went 5 years of doctor’s visits before finding my own diagnosis in a paperback book I saw in a bookstore’s window as I walked by. I took the book to a doctor and he learned from it, too. That was back in 1994. I had started having symptoms in 1985 and it just kept getting worse. Finally, a doctor sent me to a pain management doctor and I found a support group for Fibro and took a copy of every paper, pamphlet and article they had on the problem. We learned about it together and he was a big help. I took my poor husband to the meetings and it was then that he started understanding that it wasn’t just me. We met some men with Fibro. then. That was back before it was called Fibromyalgia then and it was just a series of symptoms. My husband heard the stories and realized that this was a real thing. It helps to know other people who also have Fibro and other Chronic Pain Diseases. I have had this for at least 30+ years now and I also have CFiDS, OA and IBS. We work around it and try not to make plans that can’t be cancelled. I take a pain med and muscle relaxer. I will tell you, Dave, what has really helped me. I take vitamins, of course, but when I started taking a combo of MSM, a good quality of Cal-Mag, Glucosmine and CoQ10, the pain started getting easier to control. I still get bad headaches, but I try to “head them off” early enough to get them under control so I don’t have to get any more spinal shots or pain shots I used to have to get when the headaches were horrible and lasted for days and even weeks at a time. I STOP and take my meds. no matter what I am doing and don’t put off taking them until I sit down or relax. When my body says, “No more, idiot”, if I don’t stop and quit, go home or whatever, I pay big time for days. I know how men, and many women like I used to be, want to work through the pain or get past it, but don’t ever do that. Train the people you love and who love you to accept that you aren’t that person anymore. You can’t afford to be. It took my grown sons several years to accept that I wasn’t going to get better and that I couldn’t help that I wasn’t the spitfire “volunteer mom” who could work a full day and still keep going. It bothered them a lot that I (in their words) “was different” and not the mom that helped them though school, was one of the first women “Assistant Scoutmasters”, went to their plays in Jr. High and High School, supported whatever they were doing, etc. They both graduated high school and went to college just as my body said, “No more” very loudly. From then on it was very difficult for a lot of years. It still would be if I kept trying to do the things my body said no to. That’s part of my story. There isn’t a miracle cure yet so all you can do is educate people around you. My husband has a male co-worker who works in the cubicle in back of him and my husband has been able to be a support to him..especially when I’m having a bad day(s) and he knows that his co-worker will need extra support that day. Please know that you are not alone, Dave.

I have met many men who have Fibro over the years. If you can find a Fibro support group in your area, you will meet men, women and even some children who have Fibro and it’s related diseases. Also the more you learn about it, the easier it is to deal with it. I’m one of those people who has had Fibro for so long that my doctors had to learn from treating people like me–when Fibro wasn’t excepted by doctors or anyone for that matter and we were made to feel it was all in our heads. I went 5 years of doctor’s visits before finding my own diagnosis in a paperback book I saw in a bookstore’s window as I walked by. I took the book to a doctor and he learned from it, too. That was back in 1994. I had started having symptoms in 1985 and it just kept getting worse. Finally, a doctor sent me to a pain management doctor and I found a support group for Fibro and took a copy of every paper, pamphlet and article they had on the problem. We learned about it together and he was a big help. I took my poor husband to the meetings and it was then that he started understanding that it wasn’t just me. We met some men with Fibro. then. That was back before it was called Fibromyalgia then and it was just a series of symptoms. My husband heard the stories and realized that this was a real thing. It helps to know other people who also have Fibro and other Chronic Pain Diseases. I have had this for at least 30+ years now and I also have CFiDS, OA and IBS. We work around it and try not to make plans that can’t be cancelled. I take a pain med and muscle relaxer. I will tell you, Dave, what has really helped me. I take vitamins, of course, but when I started taking a combo of MSM, a good quality of Cal-Mag, Glucosmine and CoQ10, the pain started getting easier to control. I still get bad headaches, but I try to “head them off” early enough to get them under control so I don’t have to get any more spinal shots or pain shots I used to have to get when the headaches were horrible and lasted for days and even weeks at a time. I STOP and take my meds. no matter what I am doing and don’t put off taking them until I sit down or relax. When my body says, “No more, idiot”, if I don’t stop and quit, go home or whatever, I pay big time for days. I know how men, and many women like I used to be, want to work through the pain or get past it, but don’t ever do that. Train the people you love and who love you to accept that you aren’t that person anymore. You can’t afford to be. It took my grown sons several years to accept that I wasn’t going to get better and that I couldn’t help that I wasn’t the spitfire “volunteer mom” who could work a full day and still keep going. It bothered them a lot that I (in their words) “was different” and not the mom that helped them though school, was one of the first women “Assistant Scoutmasters”, went to their plays in Jr. High and High School, supported whatever they were doing, etc. They both graduated high school and went to college just as my body said, “No more” very loudly. From then on it was very difficult for a lot of years. It still would be if I kept trying to do the things my body said no to. That’s part of my story. There isn’t a miracle cure yet so all you can do is educate people around you. My husband has a male co-worker who works in the cubicle in back of him and my husband has been able to be a support to him..especially when I’m having a bad day(s) and he knows that his co-worker will need extra support that day. Please know that you are not alone, Dave.